there happens to be story tellers that tell of elaborate tales to little children in Egypt about how a Pharaoh used to rule all that they saw and the mystical things that took place. their eyes would gleam with amazement and joy as the story of the millennia's unfolded. remember, when we were kids and we would dream of being fire fighters and super heroes? i feel so old thinking about the times i thought i'd be a movie star or save the world from all the inhuman things that happen in it or the doctor that would find the cure for cancer. that deep desire to pursue the unknown, the unavoidable, the adventurous are all gone because i had to grow up. whatever happened to that twinkle in my eye? whatever happened to that classy white smile that would spread like a disease in the middle of a hospital?

philosophically, there are a lot of ways in the world that I don't understand but I often find myself trying to. the weirdest part about growing up for me is the level of seriousness i have had to take upon myself. i never was a serious kid; i always had a smile, and a laugh not far behind. i would dream in far off places with castles, mountains, deserts, and the soft white colds with the sun poking through. or dreamt of my self lost in woods looking over the vastness of Mother Nature and the serenity of every thing. all seems to have softly faded away as i've grown older, and now i stand before you a scared going-to-be-twenty male. however, there is a light at the end of the tunnel of hope. with my age, wisdom has followed, and with that some happiness too.

it isn't every day that you wake up and the sun shines brightly in from the cracks of your window onto your face. all you can do is smile and be thankful that today might just be the day something so magical happens to you. whatever that might be, i do not know. how there ever was a time that i doubted myself physically, emotionally, spiritually – i have to admit it seems foolish when you are on top of the world looking down. wisdom does not grow on trees or underneath our feet, but instead deep inside the shelves of our imagination. though pushed away for later usage as we get older, the need for our imagination becomes more desperate or desired. slowly my imagination is creeping out of the hallow halls of my mind and in front of my eyes.

a calming but complex time is ahead of me; but with my little ball of imagination slowly growing i sense a chance for the greatest of opportunity for me. not now, not tomorrow, but some day i will be a super hero to some one (maybe even a few) and when that day comes, i will be the happiest person on the face of the earth.

geez, felix. where did that come from? anyway, i just wanted to say that my burning-of-midnight-oil nights are finally over. yesh. no more projects. no more programming, no more flash, no more presentation. none. zilt. but wait a minute felix. don't you have exams to take? well yeah, but haven't i told you how much i rock at this shit? yes, even without touching the book. hail me now everyone. *worships felix* my c# presentation turned out to be not so bad. i only started this morning and rushed through it to the last minute. some were not working at all but the teacher was patient enough to help me check the errors which turned out that all my database names aren't specific enough (like DateNow instead of just "Date" and stuffs like that). i hope i make sense to you. *yes i do*.

friendster is getting annoying with all the constant new stuffs. my cousins had been bugging the comp all day just to add a freaking video to it. and even worse, they constantly asked for my help which wouldn't be such a big deal if i wasn't rushing for my freaking project. like i've said before, friendster is just a popularity contest. see who has more "friends". (i'm nominating my girl cousin since she already has FOUR accounts in less than a year while i only have 200 friends in 2 years). a competition for who is the cam-whore slut of the milleniun. (i nominate my girl cousin again cause she constantly takes her own picture every 10 minutes. well i exaggerate, but still, she likes to take her own picture like ALOT). someone needs to hack into friendster and delete the whole database they have. oh alright, maybe i'm just a bitter bitch who only has 200 friends.

and the OC was so sad just now. *sobs* and marissa cooper and summer roberts rock my world.